I was born in London, the sixth child and a twin in a family of eight. My parents met at Art School. My father, recognising the need to feed his growing brood, became a legal aid lawyer and my mother became a ceramic artist. We lived in a crumbling Victorian house full of people and pets. In 1989, intending to have a six month break from legal training and follow my interest in pottery, I came to Kyoto.
However, my life took a different direction after I went to see a dance performance by butoh master Katsura Kan, shortly after arriving in Kyoto. The dance moved something deep inside and motivated me to discover more about artistic expression through butoh. With no previous experience in dance or performance, I began taking Kan’s classes and became a group member of “Saltimbanques”. The process to consciously move my body has been an ongoing struggle. In those early days, I couldn’t speak Japanese and I was full of grief after the recent death of my mother. Even though it was difficult, butoh allowed me to dig deeper into myself and communicate beyond words.
Meanwhile, I began training in qigong with a Chinese teacher who had trained with Yang Mei June, the master of Wild Goose Qigong in Beijing. I was beginning to become aware of the movement of “ki” (Qi/Chi in Chinese) within my own body and experience a sense of well-being. I remember I had some tenacious verruccas on my left foot which suddenly disappeared after a month of practice.
Around that time, in 1992, I started studying shiatsu with master Ryokyu Endo. I wanted to understand more about healing and the natural intelligence of the human body. Along with the form and theory, I learnt about the flow of Ki through Meridians, grounding, using my body in a balanced way and connecting somatically and energetically with another person. I felt the healing process was subtle, deep and unique to each person.
In an effort to widen my understanding of butoh, I continued my butoh training with Min Tanaka and Kazuo and Yoshito Ohno. I was impressed with Min Tanaka’s system of training including bodywork and farming. Kazuo Ohno’s freestyle movements and his ability to tap into his subconscious and viscerally connect with the audience fascinated me. At one of Kazuo Ohno’s performances, I became aware of tears running down my face without knowing why. I carried on performing duos with Ken Mai in choreographed pieces as well as self-created solos.
Searching for fresh inspiration, I realised I needed to learn a basic dance technique. I also felt, if I was going to stay longer in Kyoto, I wanted to dive deeper into the culture. In 2005, I decided to train in Nihon buyoh (traditional Japanese dance) after participating in a summer intensive workshop with Senrei Nishikawa. She was a renowned Nihon buyoh performer who choreographed her own pieces and was open minded to other dance genres, including butoh. The teaching was very strict, precise and challenging. Not only was I taught traditional dance, but I had to learn the intricacies of wearing kimono, an integral part of the choreography. Since 2010, in collaborations with musicians and artists in my original performances, I felt I could access a wider range of movement and a renewed sense of courage.
During regular walks in my neighbourhood, while researching for a writing project (later published in Deep Kyoto Walks), I gradually befriended an old man who was a gardener in an allotment. He was totally surprised when my partner asked him to teach us how to grow vegetables. He immediately introduced us to the landowner, negotiated a plot for us next to his and over a period of four years shared his vast knowledge of gardening until his death in 2017. Thanks to Isseki-san, gardening has become vital in informing my everyday life, not only feeding and strengthening my body, but also inspiring and grounding my dance and shiatsu.